Was putting my cards away but felt like there was a message that needed to be seen.
Not sure if anyone needs to see this. It seems as though it’s for someone who is going through a lot of troubles, some seem financial but some seem to be with someone who is slow moving or not fast to act. It may feel like things are moving slow even though you are putting in a lot of work. It feels as though you may not be able to talk about these problems or that you have no one to talk to about these problems. It may feel like you are breaking your back to make things work or that you may feel the load that you have is too heavy.
I’m unsure if there is a full moon happening in August. Perhaps you may gain some clarity or just have better times ahead in that month due to your hard work paying off
Maybe the color green is significant. Makes me think of money so it feels financial. Maybe you or someone else is green with envy about the finances of others or the progress of others.
I’ve been taking a small break from Outlander to focus on some other tasks but I will return. This just happened to be one of the other tasks.
This book has been on my radar for a while. Whenever I’m scrolling through my Facebook reels I always got ads for this book. It seemed interesting enough and I thought the premise was cool. Fated mates who kill each other in every lifetime sounded like it was something that was right up my alley.
Although I was excited about it, I was a little sad cause I wanted to do a story kind of similar to this but not exactly. I know stories like this have been told over and over again and it’s not exactly a new concept but it’s still kinda disheartening when you see a concept you want to do get popular before you have a chance to try it for yourself.
Regardless, I still considered buying the book. Before I clicked pay, I had serious reservations for a moment. Normally I don’t buy books unless I’ve read them and loved them. I didn’t look at any reviews for the book and just went in blind. Normally I would know a little bit about the story due to hearing about it on booktube or Facebook or Twitter but I didn’t even know it had gotten released until one of my booktubers was talking about it.
I was nervous I wouldn’t like it. I feel like sometimes you just have that gut feeling that you’re not going to like a book and that you should listen to yourself so you can save time, money, and heartache.
I enjoyed the first 50 pages out of 737. I bought it on my phone so I’m not sure if the page count is the same all around but it was much longer than I was expecting.
The writing is okay. A bit too flowery. I feel like it tried too hard in certain aspects. Like the poetry sucked, very surface level type things. I went into it thinking it would be a mature read for some reason but it is definitely a YA novel to it’s core. I can’t say I’m in the business to read YA right now but that doesn’t mean I don’t enjoy it. When it’s done good, it’s great, when it’s done like this, it sucks.
This was some of the poetry. I hated it. This isn’t even a haiku like what is this?? Waxing poetic bullshit
Everything felt kind of bland to me. The writing was okay but that’s all it is. It didn’t knock me off my socks or anything. It was just writing that I’ve already seen in a voice I had read a million times before. The events were bland. Everything was just very lackluster. Maybe my expectations were too high.
I thought I would be reading something different than what was advertised. I think maybe I just wasn’t the intended reader.
I only got about 25% through before I decided to call it quits. I feel like the author was trying way too hard to sell me on how fated the two main characters were supposed to be. I feel like I was supposed to think that their love was/is all consuming and there’s this magnetism that draws them together. And like it would’ve felt like that if every other paragraph literally wasn’t just that. I thought that the flashbacks were nice and fit the story very well but I feel like we didn’t spend enough time in the present. Mind you, I only read to 25% so maybe that could change if I read more of the book.
It got to a point where I was like barely looking and just skimming. I was so bored with the dialogue. I think my biggest gripe with this book is that the writing felt too flat. It didn’t excite me at all.
For all that I didn’t like, I did like some aspects. I thought the concept was cool. I like a nice fated mates story when it’s done right. There was some yearning but I didn’t really feel it tbh. I thought that the idea of love leaving the body when you die or the conversation they had about death and grief when they were in Algeria.
I think maybe at some point I’ll try to finish this book, I am curious to know if the twist is what I think it is. I will make an updated post if I ever decide to finish it.
A friend and I did some shopping after work. Went to a Tarot shop that I sometimes stop by. I have plans to make an alter for my practice and I wanted to gather some supplies.
Bought yet another tarot astrology book to enrich my mind and another deck!! I don’t want to show pictures of the deck as of now as I just don’t feel it’s time but I can tell you what the deck is. It’s a tea reading deck. Specifically the Tea Leaf deck. I feel like this deck and I are going to do some spectacular readings together. I’m so excited!!
I did enjoy a nice cbd ciggy on the porch as I read. The weather was great but it was a lil chilly
I went to the library after work with some friends last week. I picked up my book club book along with some other things. Electric Idol was one my friend recommended. I haven’t read the first book in that series but she recommended it highly and I am nothing if not obedient to the vertically challenged women in my life 🫡
I was perusing the fiction section like I always do. I was looking for Romance. With a capital R. I wanted yearning. I wanted sexual tension. I wanted to kick my feet up and squeal like I once did in high school over wattpad books.
Outlander caught my eye. I tried watching Outlander a couple months ago. I’d always been curious about the show. I remember when it was on air when it was popular. I thought the show was nice. The acting was good, the cast was attractive, the tension in the story was enticing but it wasn’t what I was looking for at that time. Like I felt with A Discovery of Witches, I felt that I would’ve had a better time if I read it.
So I checked out the first 2 books in the 8 book series.
It was a little ambitious since I wasn’t sure if I was would like the first book but I went with my gut. I knew I would like the story, I was already enticed enough to pick up the book. I just had to give it a chance.
I’m happy to report that it has passed not only the 50 page test but also the 100 and 200 page test. It didn’t take long for me to get invested. I felt like once I read the first sentence, I knew it had me. It’s been a while since I felt this way about a book. Not many of them have passing the 50 page test these days. I have seen what the masses are reading and while I love that they’re reading, the quality is literally gutterbutt dog shit. But that’s a rant for another time.
The tension, the descriptions, the characters have actual depth to them and don’t make me feel like I’ve seen them 1000 times. The protagonist is older yet I don’t feel how old she is at the same time. I don’t feel like any of the relationships or things going on are forced. Hell I was actually waiting with bated breath and giggling when the characters interacted cutely or in general. The writing is lovely. Sometimes I feel like things could be too wordy but it doesn’t take away from the story unless I’m blitzed while reading. She has an impressive vocabulary and I find myself googling words that she uses. It’s nice to have a book that makes me engage in that way. The storytelling is great. The pacing doesn’t leave me wondering with too many questions in the way of plot holes. I find myself thinking about the plot and what’s going to happen next. I lowkey can’t really predict where the story is going and I love that. I feel like with the books that are out today, the shit is so predictable. It’s like authors don’t want me to use my brain or something when I’m reading. They suck at foreshadowing and can’t even write suspense that well either. The only tensions they know how to build is sexual and romantic tension. Where is the other shit that can be tensed? It can’t just always be stressing about love and sex. Why does the love have to be central to the plot. This just feels like a long winded way of saying the authors that are somewhat popular right now really fucking suck. I really can’t be arsed to read them.
God it’s so good to feel excitement about this again. I feel like how I felt when I was 15 and waiting for my favorite author to update. I have theories but I can’t stop reading long enough to expand on them because I want to read more. Thank god this book series is finished so I can binge it.
Anyway, I’m excited to have finally found something my speed after not quite tickling my fancy for a while. I’ll give my thoughts on this series after I’m a little more than halfway.
Here are some passages that made me giggle and kick my feet
It is my good friend’s birthday today. We met while I was working as a patient meal deliverer, I don’t think I was a manager quite yet.
I fuck with you the long way Kermy. You’re a great guy and a great friend. Always there to listen and always there when I need a laugh and or smoke. The world is truly blessed to have you as am I.
We’ve been waiting to share a legal drink for a long time, I’m happy we can finally see the day
The one older coworker who I don’t like is gone. I get to work with one of my favorite coworkers. My Minecraft house looks good, it’s one of good friend’s birthdays tomorrow. Like it just doesn’t get any better than this 😫🥺
If the message does not apply, it is not meant for you. Check other placements in your chart( Sun, Moon, Rising,Venus). May not resonate now but may down the road or later. May talk about past, present, or future situations/feelings/people
The World:
The end of a journey with a person or situation is near. You may have been dealing with this person for the last 3 years. You have may have known this person for 3 years. There may be a 3 year age difference. The month of March could be significant. I’m just getting that the last 3 months or 3 years have been quite hard or difficult. It’s not quite shaping up to how you envisioned.
There seems to be a lot of obstacles. A lot of setbacks, they seem financial in nature but it also feels like the problem is deeper than that. Feelings of immaturity or plans beings too in the wind. Maybe you thought this person was more mature than they presented themselves or they could feel that way about you.
It feels like you have been on this road before. You know the signs. You may be feeling stuck in the situation that you are in. It may feel like you may not have anywhere else to go in the situation or vice versa. You may be in a period of stagnancy. There’s nothing happening or you feel as though you or your life have been at a standstill for the last couple months. It seems like either you or someone in this equation is stuck in the past or wanting to go back to the past. They want to go back to when things were simple. Time with this person seems to stretch but not in a good way. It almost feels like it too much time with this person. You or this person/situation may feel as there is no sight for your future or that you can’t envision what you once saw anymore.
Life is calling for you to move along this road by yourself. While there is room for another, it feels as though it is not the time or maybe not the person. You have someone on this road with you already and you do not like the sights. If you continue you will never see what you seek.
The ChariotReversed:
It may be that you were once intertwined with this person or situation. You were inseparable. Nothing could stand between you two. You saw success with this person. You thought that you and this person could ride to the end.
I feel like there’s such a big gap between this card and the previous card. It feels like you envisioned the end of the situation or success but not the actual work it would take to spell out success with this person. You were operating on the possibility of the end with this person/situation. It feels like pure impulse. It feels like this is common for you though though. Acting without planning and taking things into account. You are only thinking of success, of the bigger picture. It just feels like you or both parties went in blindly. You thought you had the end in sight but you are actually quite wrong.
Because of this. You are finding that you and this person or situation are much more opposite than you first thought. Especially within the last 7 months. It could be that there’s a 7 year age difference, an age ending in a 7 or the month of July seems significant. You have not been on the same page for quite some time. There could be an increase in bickering/arguments or you may find that you are no longer in sync. You no longer move the same or may find it harder to align your goals.
Someone in this equation is doubtful. They can sense that there are problems wrong or that you may both have approached the situation that you are in the same way I mentioned in the earlier paragraph. It just feels like there’s an air of pretending not to see. When I look at the whites of the eyes in the red dragon, it seems that someone is pretending or ignoring the big issues.
It just feels like the focus is lost here or that you or someone else is choosing not to focus on the issue at hand, the situation/relationship or better yet the work required to be with one another.
The dragons make me think that you are dealing with someone born in the year of the dragon or they may be like a dragon, greedy, monetarily focused, they may feel larger than life or like a fairy tail. They may be destructive in nature or you may be destructive.
5 of Wands:
The month of May seems significant. You may have met this person in the month of may or something significant happened. Ages/years ending in a 5 or there’s a 5 year age difference.
It feels like the beginning of this situation or relationship started out with this energy. Very chaotic, hot, passionate. It felt a little all consuming. It was exciting. It feels as though you may be dealing with a fire sign or you may have fire in your chart somewhere.
Leo season also seems to be of importance. July 23-August 22nd. It feels like something significant happened during this time frame. Some type of movement/relocation. With the fire imagery it doesn’t really seem like this came from no where. This fire or problem spilled over and was ignored. It feels like words were exchanged. Heated words. Not necessarily words of passion but definitely in the heat of the moment. It feels like whatever was said left you feeling raw and exposed. Honestly this card feels incredibly chaotic, like there are too many things happening at once. The problems that you ignored spilled over in a way that you were not expecting.
It seems as though you or this person have been consumed by the issues/problems that have been happening.You or this person may have been acting rashly or impulsively. Acting out of emotion/anger. It just feels like whatever has happened is still taking it’s toll or effect. It also feels like the fire is still spreading or it is still heavily affecting you currently. Kinda feels close to what the water signs were experiencing so you may be dealing with a water sign or have water in your chart as well.
It just doesn’t feel like you did shit about the problems you are facing. Just sitting and wallowing. I’m trying not to sound mean over text but like come on. You should’ve handled your problems like a mature person instead of just being inactive.
3 of Wands Reversed:
This energy is definitely current. This is the present day. The problems that you failed to attend to or even acknowledge has caused too many bridges to burned.
Someone in this situation has been very emotional and pensive. They have been thinking a lot about the past. It feels like retrograde/eclipse energy. That’s why it feels current. We just started of a retrograde on the 15th this month and we just had an eclipse. I can tell that it is not you who is emotional and pensive about this situation. The other person involved certainly is. It feels as though this person doesn’t want you to know they are feeling/thinking this way. They want to put up a United Front or at least that kind of what the imagery suggests to me. But that’s all that it is. It is just an image. A facade. They are trying to block anything else from happening that would be considered bad or let anyone else know that they are feelings these feelings. This person isn’t really good at expressing how they feel or they made be scared to acknowledge these feelings. There is definitely some distance though. It feels both emotional and physical.
However it feels as though you may need to uncross or unwind what is going on before it consumes you both. It seems as though you are both going in different directions or should be going in different directions but when your paths crossed both felt that world card energy of seeing it to the end with this person or situation. It just feels like you are in each other way. When you crossed paths it blocked a lot of other things for both parties. It could be the reason for the stagnancy or periods of stagnancy or just feeling like you’re not getting anywhere.
It just feels as though in order to move forward, you need to talk. It is what the world card and quite frankly the world is trying to tell you.
The Magician:
This person could’ve felt like the one. Or maybe you have gotten signs that this person could be the one. I feel like I stated earlier that this relationship was once passionate and playful. It gave you a lot of hope. It had you pulling out all the stops. I definitely felt that eye on the prize energy in the chariot card. It felt like you got the prize or thing you were seeking but didn’t do much planning after that. This person or situation that was presented gave hope that you could move forward. Enough to offer something. January seems significant.
However it feels like someone in this situation could be acting as a magician or that you both may be acting this way. They might not be appearing as they once did or the future they painted out or you imagined might not look as magical or promising as it once did. It definitely feels like the magic has worn off and you or both of you are seeing each other differently.
The honeymoon phase is definitely over. If the past 6-7 months didn’t prove that, maybe this last month did or next month will. The relationship or situation doesn’t have that light hearted energy anymore. There are too many stressors now. Life is getting real and your relationship is getting realer. The life you were trying to create with this person is much harder than you originally believed or imagined. I don’t really think both parties did much thinking about that part. It feels like you saw an end and tried to rush towards that.
The hand almost looks like a hand that you would put up when you are telling someone to pause or wait. It feels like both of you could be magicians in this situation. Trying to create something with each other but it just hasn’t seemed to be working. This also sounds silly to say but it has the energy of a missed high five. It’s not in reverse so I can tell that both parties started with both feet forward with intentions to create/start something new. But it has the air of being left hanging. Maybe you both started out all in but now one of you has gone astray or is not putting in the work required. This could be the retreat card energy. I see someone wanting to pull away or disconnect. You may be trying to go away with each other to disconnect from the world in order to be more with each other. It doesn’t feel like the trips together or time together is really helping the situation though.
The Tower/Seven of Coins/5 of cups/ 9 of Coins
The chaos that is happening around you needs to be confronted and controlled. Accountability and owning your part in the chaos is the only way. Right now you are in it but the only way to get outside of it is to get through your problems. You do that by actually dealing with them. No pussyfooting and feet dragging.
It’s time to be truthful with yourself and the situation. The more you continue to resist or ignore, the taller the flames and the bigger the problems will be. They will only stack on top of each other. This situation has a lot of emotion involved. A lot of hopes and dreams were invested in this situation. A lot of pride too. That could be the Leo energy that I felt when pulling this card. People tend to see Leo’s are prideful and arrogant. It feels like there is a lot of that energy in this situation from both parties. You were both so prideful in the connection and that it would work. I’m incredibly sorry to burst your bubbles but life and the situation/relationship you have put yourself in is not. Fear of failure and loss is heavy with this person. They may hate losing/being wrong(this person has never been told “I told you so” or humbled) or things not working out. This person may be very self sacrificing because they are so prideful. They refuse to acknowledge when things just aren’t working.
There’s cancer energy ruminating in this reading but not because you could be dealing with water signs. Cancers are known for being emotional as well as looking back at the past. I think I mentioned in a previous paragraph that someone is thinking heavily about the past. They exist there. They are thinking of things that were promised towards the beginning of the relationship. They are not seeing the results they had quite hoped for. They are feeling that 3 of wands reversal and the world card energy. They too are wondering why they aren’t where they thought they’d be. They are wondering where the expansion is that was promised. They are thinking of lost opportunities that could’ve helped that they didn’t do. They may be realizing or you may be realizing that these promises that were made in the beginning may not be a grand as they were originally. Instead they see the risks and what it took to get here at this point. They are wondering if it was worth it. If they burned too many bridges. They are wondering if you too are happy where you’re at currently.
The energy doesn’t feel like guilt but it sure as hell doesn’t feel like accountability lmao. These feelings fluctuate between wanting to feel guilt and wanting to ignore. They are ignoring how they feel about the big questions being posed about this situation. I just don’t think they’re expressing their true feelings when they are trying to enact these changes.They feel a bit two faced. That could be where the Libra energy is coming from or you or this person could have Libra placements. People tend to think Libra’s are liars or dishonest. I’m not endorsing it but libras can be very passive and that energy is all over this reading considering how nothing is being taken care of. They’re not trying to fix things, they just want that desired outcome. They are trying to fight the feelings of failure by trying to enact change so it doesn’t fail. That’s not a bad thing but too much has been done. Too much damage has been suffered on all ends.
Full Moon in Aries, Full Moon Eclipse, Fixed Moon
In order to not sound like a broken record. But this end is approaching you whether you’re ready to accept it or not. Full speed like the energy of a ram. Hard and fast and abrupt. Definitely Aries season you may be knocked sideways by this ending. I see it being heated. I see arguments. I see that people in the situation were not willing to listen. I see anger and stubbornness. I see it all coming to a head. Everything that was being ignored can no longer be ignored. That cancer energy that I was speaking of earlier is also about karma. You are about to reap what you sow.
While this ending may be unexpected, it is clearing the path for you. In time you will appreciate your path being cleared. I see positive outcomes from this parting. I see you being able to get back up like you always do and dusting yourself off.
For further proof or validation, I was finishing this up on my break and I had 3 minutes left on my timer. I was on schedule to be back on time. Once I saw that I was reaching the end of this reading and being close to done, time somehow got away from me. I was 2 minutes late for my break. The fear of not being where I was supposed to be at a given time is the message of this. Instead of being passive when I noticed the time, I took action and left immediately.
It sounds like some of you or people you know need to learn how to do just that.
I’m starting to learn that me and potatoes don’t have a good relationship.
I love to eat them and they love to be eaten by me but they make it so hard.
I was feeling rather festive today since it’s St. Paddy’s Day. Normally I would make a corned beef inspired dish but I didn’t have time to go out a buy any but more importantly, I got a root canal done last week on Thursday so I can only eat soft foods. It definitely limits a lot of what I can eat and I was advised potatoes in any form would suffice just fine.
I’ve never made a Shepards pie but I’ve eaten one. It was pretty good and it looked fairly easy to make. I’m starting to learn on my cooking adventure that the easier it looks to make, the harder it actually is.
Like every meal that I decide to make, I had to go grocery shopping right away after work. I looked at a recipe but I didn’t follow it to a T. I knew I had most ingredients at home save for the ground beef, the potatoes, and the veggies. Basically everything important I needed lmao.
I feel like there’s always that one thing you can’t find when you’re buying ingredients for you meal, at least in my case there always is. I’ve gotten better at improvising and substitutions for my meals, so I’m glad that I’m becoming a stronger cook but god damn.
I found everything relatively quickly. The potatoes were good, however I knew I was going to have problems when I looked at the ground beef they had left. In this household we are strictly 80/20. I love my fat, it adds to the flavor and I will accept nothing less. Except I had to today because there was literally nothing left but 90/10. I was dejected but the show much go on.
I had planned on using canned veggies since I was lazy and didn’t want to do any more chopping or cutting than I needed to. Also I’ve been playing a modded Minecraft server and that has been taking up a lot of my time. I’ll get more into that on another post though.
Right so, canned veggies and less chopping. I found the green beans and corn easy enough but I feel like it can’t be a Shepard’s pie if there’s no carrots.
And just like the chicken broth fiasco, there were no canned carrots.
I could’ve just gotten fresher carrots in the produce section but you’re talking to a Minecraft fiend so I was not open to the suggestion at all. I just had to have fucking canned carrots.
Once again I found myself, thankfully on a much nicer sunnier day, patrolling the street for carrots. I checked the first corner store by my home and found none. I already suspected they wouldn’t have any, I’ve never seen any there but a girl was hoping.
I made the trek with a sack of potatoes in tow up the street to the other corner store I knew. To my dismay and my aching arms, there were no carrots there. But they had mixed veggies so I took those as payment.
me on da porch after trekking for something so fucking meaningless like carrots #firstworldproblems
Making it was not that hard. My only problem was with the beef that I choose. I like to season things. You’ll never find anything bland in our house. But this meat and I were fighting. I knew I was using adequate seasoning but whenever I tasted it, it just tasted bland. Bland enough to where I had to ask my boyfriend to taste test and step in. We tried adding butter to meat so that it would add more fat. It worked a little bit but I didn’t want to try anymore as my meat was getting over cooked.
I didn’t even sweat the mashed potatoes. I could make that shit in my sleep. However I underestimated how much butter we had left so I had use to maragine halfway through. Aint nothing wrong with margarine, I just don’t really like cooking with it all too much. It’s my god given right for my butter to taste like it should kill me. I’m a crocker. I love Country Crock butter guys. It’s more than just a spread to me. Anyway, I use heavy whipping cream, butter, sour cream, salt, pepper, garlic salt, and more butter just to be safe when making my mashies.
Even though I went through all that hard work for those 2 cans of mixed vegetables, I didn’t end up using them. Stupid, I know right. But imagine if you were me, making a Shepards pie for the first time but everyone is hopping on Minecraft without you. You’d skip it too.
The recipe I was following was hard as shit to read when it came to preheating the oven and baking it. I had to stand there and reread that shit 10 times while I was getting fucked by creepers, zombies, and skeletons. I found 425 to be suitable for my oven. The recipe said I didn’t have to cover it with foil so I personally didn’t. I probably should have, it wasn’t dry or anything like that but it probably would’ve made the top more golden.
It was cool to make, my only regrets would be the beef and the lack of carrots. I should’ve just taken the time to cut the carrots instead of taking the easy way out. The normally tastes better when you put more effort into it.
An effort was made and it was good, I would probably rate it a 6/10.
The Abode 
